I see your eyes in the moon

I was walking through the crowded hallways of my school the other day when I heard someone
say something that really made me think.

"This girl I used to be friends with ...."

A normal start of a sentence correct? Well this moment it struck me differently. It made me think about all the friends I used to have and how quickly I have moved on from them. There are plenty of people I know that I used to be friends with that I never speak of anymore. How do we let people just drop out of our lives without even giving a second glance?

We, as human beings have so many emotions but I don't think we realize how quickly we can filter through people. I think about all the people I have known in my life and I wonder where they have all gone. Not to say that I don't have any friends now, because I have many, but why is it that within three years or so they will probably be replaced with new friends. All the memories that I shared will be replaced with new ones and the old one will barely be a blur.

As I sat outside tonight, starring at the moon I wondered who else was starring at that same moon with me. Was it someone I had known in the past?

While in a long-distance relationship not too long ago I told my girlfriend to look at the moon while on the phone. She went outside and did just that. I told her it made me feel closer to her that though we were 2000 miles away from each other we were looking at the same object at the same time. She agreed completely and felt more in love with me than she ever thought possible. It was at that moment that I realized how many people there were in this world and how I would filter through what would and is probably going to feel like a million of them.

A month later she broke up with me and told me that the moon would never be the same to her. The funny thing is I don't talk to her anymore. It makes me wonder if she still thinks of me when she looks at the moon. Are the people that I filtered through ever going to come back into my life? Why is it that when some people can just let go of others completely there is always the other one who is holding on dearly to the thought of them?

I try to be cold..

Yeah I thought this was it

True love had arrived

So I fell in

But what a surprise

And I bought you a ring

And I asked you to wear it

So when I found it on the bathroom sink

I shoulda known I was in for it

How do I release this?

And how do I let you go?

How do I mend my heart when I feel so low?

And how do I talk to you without crying?

And how do I let you go when I still love you?

I still love you

So I don't know if I can be just your friend

Damn you for not trying

And fuck you for standing there smiling

I know what it's like to not be able to feel

And I know what it's like, yeah

To just kiss someone and make them fall in love with you

And then you walk away

To just make somebody come a little closer

So you can push them away...

How do I release this?

And how do I let you go?

How do I mend my heart when I feel so low?

And how do I talk to you without crying?

And how do I let you go when I still love you?

I still love you...

I gave up long before

It must be something in the way you move

innocent like you gave in just like you always would

It must be something in the way they say

and the magic that you bring inbetween all you imply

this is me before I come undone

this is me before I fall apart

I've been tired for days and days

I've been tired for days and days

It could have been a month or

It could have been a year but I

I gave up long before

long before you cared

her art inspired me to

to do my best and to paint my music like

like I saw it best and

she says I grew up well

well, well I grew up strong cause

no one's got my back

no one's gonna write me my songs

It could have been a month or

It could have been a year but I

I gave up long before

cause I've been tired for days and days

I've been tired for days and days and days

I've been tired for days and days and days

I've been tired for days and days and days

I've been tired for days and days and days

My heart is crazy

Little by little by little by little by little
Little by little by little by little by little
Youre messing up my life
Tearing me apart
Breaking up my world
And Im giving up my heart
Little by little by little by little
Im losing all my prideIts really getting bad
Hurting deep inside
Is a-making me go mad, ooh
Little by little by little by little
Little by littleBit by bit
Im going crazy and youre causing it
Little by littleBit by bit
I should stop caring
But my love wont quit
Little by little by little by little by little, yeah
Little by little by little by little by little, all right
I dont know where to turn
Dont know what to doIm walking on thin ice
And it seems Im falling through, ooh
Little by little by little by little
Little by littleBit by bit
Im going crazy and youre causing it
Little by little
Bit by bitI should stop caring
But my love wont quit
Im the queen of fools
Know the deck is stacked
On a losing streak
But Im a-gonna get you back
Little by little by little by little

Ready for me

I want to go back to the nights

Where nothing seemed to matter

And everything just felt okay.

I need to be around people

I can't be alone because I think.

I think way too much ....

And I hate thinking.

And I do enjoy Skillet a lot

I haven't listened to anything else lately.

Oh and btw. I'm over it

Slash it's the fact that I'm done trying to figure it out

I spent much too long trying to figure out ..umm nothing.

Hey ..I'm bored also.

I want to find some good lyrics to put in here

Oh and ps ..I still don't know where I want to go for college!

I'm really debating MMC and CCNY.

It's pretty much the hardest decision of my life.

Ugh. I will see what happens later I guess.

Oh and more exciting news!

On March 25th I'm going to see Ingrid Michaelson and Joshua Radin

On April 22nd I'm seeing Sarah Bareilles and Rachel Yamagata

And on May 12th I'm seeing Tegan and Sara =)

Yay life.



"There's a war inside of me

Do I cause new heartbreak to write a new broken song

Do I push it down or let it run me right into the ground

I feel like I wouldn't like me if I met me

Well I can't stop talking for fear of listening to unwelcome sound

And you haven't called me in weeks and honestly it's bringing me down

I feel like I wouldn't like me if I met me

I feel like you wouldn't like me if you met me

And don't you worry there's still time

There's nothing to live for when I'm sleeping alone

And I wash the windows outside in hopes that the glare will bring you around

Sunshine is days away I won't be saved I know all the words

I can't say that I'll love you forever

I won't say that I'll love you forever"

Darkness comes I'll be beside you

"you are the buried penny at the bottom of the pool

so I guess that makes me the fool diving deep for you

I’ll stick you in my pocketall shiny, all precious, and all not mine

a hidden, forbidden treasure

baby, you’re the worst kind.

cause underneath the surface, all things loom larger

so I’m searching for your edges

to fish you up, ship you up out of the water

and you are that sweet wish that she’s thrown

I would have caught you in the air, girl, had I known."

"The paper called me a warrior.a bad girl. a bad example.

The paper said I smile big,but I curse too much.

and it's true. I doFeel like a warrior just for making it through the day,

sometimesI feel like a fighter.

Cause I fight to keep the fighting away

and sometimes,

Walking down the street is a scientific experiment.

your body laid out, splayed out, just for them to tamper with it."

Idina Menzel

A crack in the smile
But she's always in style while she waits
Waving goodbye but she's too tired to cry and she's wasted
A letter he wrote
But it's far too expose so he throws it away
The sound of regret as it's counting the steps back to safe

I don't want to leave you with perfume and promises
But we'll never know 'till we capture and bottle it'
Cause wouldn't it be such a shame
If all was wasted

Not an inch of the room
That isn't in bloom or in light
So we drink 'till its dawn
Every drip 'till it's gone and we're wasted
It's a thing of the truth
But we'll lie and we'll look for the perfect escape
And the moment will go like melted snow in the rain

I don't want to leave you with perfume and promises
But we'll never know 'till we capture and bottle it
Cause wouldn't it be such a shame
If all was wasted

Stay for another morning
Study the curves on my face
Stay even when we're unknowing
Stay 'till they tear you away

I don't want to leave you with perfume and promises
But we'll never know 'till we capture and bottle it
Cause wouldn't it be such a shame
If all was wasted